Tuesday, January 03, 2006

...SUPPOSED TO BE HERE.







Alrighty, folks... let me give you the breakdown. i went to one of the georgia islands to celebrate new years eve and day. the trip was all i envisioned it would be... with a few bonuses :-) i went with the intention of staying til sunday morning, but i ended up returning home on monday because it was just so perfect. new years eve was spent sitting outside my room on the patio... listening to the sea and watching the cloud cover moooooosey on her merry way to reveal the constellations. it was breathtaking and i DID cry. i was completely moved... i felt priviledged to see it and thanked the Creator repeatedly through the tears and simultaneously, i felt frustrated that i'd deprived myself of that which i love for so long. then, it came to me... like a bolt of lightning, "this is my nia (purpose)." i ultimately want to live a life of creation and meditation. I AM gifted and shined upon. I AM an artist. why would i waste that? i admire and respect and inhale the beauty around me and create and craft from that and that's what i want to do as my livelihood. and maybe i should state this part too.........i felt, while standing there, that i want to live a life where i can come outside MY home and hear the waves crashing to the shore and feel the sun on my face or watch the constellations. that is my happiness. and that is where im supposed to be.